A silver orb sings
Pulsing call
Predator rises
Hunger, driving lust
Not human
Wicked, sinful, urge
He sings into night
warning all
who may venture close
Surprised by the one
who does not
run, rather invites
Teasing and playful
enticing
inciting madness
He follows her scent
darkened woods
through skeleton trees
Scent of December
remember
what big teeth you have....
Sam (@Semaphore) is treating us to "La Lune" over at FormForAll today...think you know haiku? Give us a visit at dVersePoets and show us what you got.
27 comments:
First, I think!! Yet another strong piece from you Tash. I love the story telling and the way the stanzas linnk together, although each could stand alone. Encore!!
that one that is inviting either is crazy or like a dance on the dark side...ha....really like how you zoom out in the last bit...to the scent of december and its big teeth...smiles....nice tash
Deliciously evil undertones, sinister sounding, I like it!
Sinister story telling ~ That last one gives this bite ~
Love this! And the last line, wonderful!
Ha, I love that last one - such a playful ending. It's great how you thread them all together. :)
Super charming! Happy Birthday. This works just so well - a mixture of wild and woolly! k.
What a marvelous write, Natasha. There are so many really good parts to this poem. I thoroughly enjoy it. Keep it up my friend. Outstand!!
There's a great story in this and the rhythm is strong. Those last lines will stay with me for a while.
The last two are my favorites.
Very sinister indeed. Love how you build up the tension and then we're left wondering...nice!
This story definitely leaves the reader wanting to know MORE and what next! Wow.
Wow... wicked good, Tash.
a wicked run through the dark here. I'm imagine the chase was quite thrilling.
Gorgeously dark - captivating story - love it!
You did it! That sharp-toothed twist in the last line sent me back to read the poem over again, and that foreboding sense was heightened by the staccato rhythms in the lune's short lines. Well done!
great!
fantastic work Tash. Really love how you chose the Kelly lunes and how you took the ball and ran with it, exceptionally done. Thanks
just love the big teeth closure..made me think of that fairy tale rotkäppchen - not sure how you call it in english.. you were dancing on the dark side for sure..smiles...hope you had a wonderful birthday tash
wonderful haiku...sound is eerie but totally refreshing..
The night allows for so much of ourselves to seep out...or run out, ravenous. Love how we both dove into the moonlight.
Gene
BRAVA! The tale you tell is complete and replete with vivid imagery. And you follow chained form throughout. Well done. My muse wandered into the predator's realm as well, with this prompt.
Oooh, very inticing write. Love your final two lunes particularly.
Oh very nice! The moon shines, the beast howls, the need grips and then the cruel cold bite! So, so nice!
Tash, this is once again brilliant! What a cool story you tell, vivid imagery with a tinge of darkness and the last stanza... just wow.
Oh, my. Sensuous and sinister and very very clever. Thank you.
..shivers...i would be scared to walk through those skeleton trees in a darkened woods with that guest from the wild... you brought your lunes to almost a reality... excellent... smiles...
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